The Last Weekend…with Patricia Clarkson

No, this isn’t a scene from the 2014 movie, The Last Weekend.

It’s my husband’s childhood lake house.

Even though this movie only recorded 32% Rotten Tomatoes, I have watched bits and pieces of this film no less than a dozen (maybe more) times.

Why?  You ask.

  I watch movies that ‘speak to me’….over & over & over….ad nauseam.

That’s just me.

And, to be completely honest, I have always had this running joke with my family that I am “best friends with Patty Clarkson”.

It goes without saying, I am NOT.

I can guarantee you that she doesn’t remember me from our days at LSU (Louisiana State University).

(I vaguely remember her dating a fraternity brother of my husband’s once.  Who knows if over the decades, I mis-remembered that!)

It’s just a perpetual funny that my husband loves to share with me.

If we happen to find a Patricia Clarkson movie, he’ll point out that my “best friend” is in the movie….so it’s a MUST that we watch it.

So one quiet weekend when my husband was out of town on business…

I curled up on the sofa – sipping a blazing cup of Community coffee with my dog son, Buddy, to watch my “best friend, Patty” in The Last Weekend.

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For all of you Baby Boomer moms (and dads) reading this morning –

This movie is a must-see.

Not only does this film include incredible talent, it is a powerful movie because of the family lessons to be learned for Boomer moms (dads,too) and their millennial, adult kids.

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THE MOM – CELIA GREEN

Celia (Patricia Clarkson) is a well-to-do mom who envisions and compulsively plans a perfect Labor Day weekend with her 2 adult sons.

She is a perfectionist….which I related to immediately.

She is in constant motion with rapid-fire thoughts swirling around her head – again, a relatable attribute.

And too, Celia possesses unattractive characteristics and suffers from her share of shortcomings….needless-to-say, I stand charged and guilty to that as well.

But through all of the dialogue and interactions, I could surmise that withstanding all of Celia’s obvious faults and failures, she did her very best to be The Best Mom….that she had the capability of being.

I, too, found common ground there.

By all accounts, I was never – on one day – a perfect mom.

But I tried to be.

Even missing the mark of perfection perpetually, I kept working at honing my mom (and later on, my mother-in-law) skills….until I watched The Last Weekend….last month.

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THE SONS – THEO & ROGER GREEN

It was abundantly obvious from the opening scenes that these 2 boys “tolerated” their mom.

I felt there was genuine love…but no return of affection.

And, there’s a huge difference between familial love and compassionate affection.

Theo and Rodger were quick to point out Celia’s flaws and foibles (and there were plenty to point out!).

Criticism surfaced early and often during the last weekend at the lake house.

These 2 young adult men – who by all accounts – had lived an advantaged life full of fun times at their (not one, but two) weekend homes…

Despite all of this, these men [who were afforded childhoods that only few could possibly imagine or wish for]….elected to assume the role of the Highly Vocal Critic of their mother.

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THE LESSON for Millennial Adult Kids

This is a lesson for Millennial, Adult kids….Sons & Daughters.

Stop criticizing not only your mom….but your dad, as well.

Stop dissecting every single imperfection of your childhood.

Stop remembering each and every cross word or unfortunate incident in your home.

Simply….Stop punishing your parents for not being perfect….

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But choose to realize that your parents are just people trying their very best.

Be grateful that your parents graciously gave all of their Time, Treasure, & Talents to make your life (almost) perfect.

Your parents gave their time to help with endless hours of homework, attend years of sporting events, and countless (sometimes, mind-numbing) school programs.

Your parents gave their treasure (money) to send you to college without the burden of student loans – which equates to driving a 3 -series BMW off a cliff, yearly…..yes, think about that one!

Your parents used their talents (many times postponing their own vocational dreams to stay in the safe and secure job) to earn a good living to provide for the niceties in life such as vacations and cars/insurance and to buy the latest, greatest gadgets for Christmas.

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THE LESSON for Baby Boomer Moms & Dads

Stop.

Just Stop.

EVERYTHING.

Allow your life to become quiet and comfortable and still…

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All of us Boomer parents need to reconnect to each other.

Learn to become a ‘childless’ couple again.

It certainly doesn’t mean to ignore or put your kids on “mute.”

It really means that you should tell yourself and tell your spouse….

Job. Well. Done.

You’ve grown up tiny babies into highly functioning, independent adults….with their own precious families….their own successful careers…their own unique lives to be lived.

Now, we Baby Boomers should learn to be independent, successful, highly functioning Empty-Nesters!

As in the final scene of The Last Weekend, Celia Green and her husband ( Malcolm) were alone in the driveway in a sweet embrace.

Let that be you and your husband.

Let that be me and my husband.

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Of course, this remarkable movie is not an absolute depiction of what I have experienced (thank goodness!) with my kids or what my friends have experienced with their kids (thank goodness – twice!)….of course, it’s Hollywierd – so everything is overly dramatic and overly excessive.

But I have noticed time and time again…how quickly the majority of millennials choose to point out parental problems.

As I have always written in my blog and my manuscripts, I am a HUGE FAN of certain characteristics of millennials.

And it goes without saying – we, baby boomers, have our share of baggage. (My writings have been totally transparent about our downfalls.)

But as the movie so eloquently illustrates, this set – of young adults – is just so dang eager to pull the trigger on pointing out that a ‘good life’ still isn’t the perfect one…

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So here’s my final thought for you this beautiful December day.

During the holidays, grab a cup of piping-hot cocoa in a giant, red holiday mug along with an over-the-top iced Christmas cookie…and watch the movie with your millennial kids.

Both generations can learn valuable lessons while being entertained by my “best friend” – Patty.

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SPOILER ALERT:  DON’T READ IF YOU DON’T WANT TO KNOW THE ENDING!

P.S.

And, if my kids read this post or if my family/friends click on today…

Don’t worry….we (unlike Celia & Malcolm Green) didn’t sign the papers to sell the lake house  – without telling the kids!